We were on a business trip together with some other people, and I'd been wanting her but behaving myself. And then she came and found me and asked if I would sleep in her room with her so that some guy who'd been dogging her would leave her alone.

Can you hear my groin twisting into a knot.

Sure, Natalia (or whatever alias I've made up for her before, I forget), *scrunch*, I'll come sleep with you, *wring*, in your bed, *twist*, where I can, like, smell your hair and try desperately not to wrap my arms around you.

Plus, I had the double-whammy working against me: a) she'd already been fending off unwanted sexual attention, and b) that stupid, stupid family rule about not having sex with anybody you work with. Dangit. Boy, was I trying to think of ways around that rule. Really brilliant plans like, Hey, I always follow the rules; I can break this one this once and they'll forgive me.

It ocurred to me in the dream that there might be a smidgeon of a chance that she knew exactly what she was doing and wanted me to try something.

It's funny how I can, with the help of my family, work up this really great sexual self-confidence. And then I walk around at work thinking, "if they only knew." I wonder what they see when they look at me. A wry humored, middle-aged (my god, am I actually middle-aged now?), stumpy dyke? Or a seething stud with a bounty of orgasms at her fingertips? I'm thinking one's more likely than the other.

Wrote up the date report last night, so don't miss it.