I'll be tossing scraps to you today mostly.

First, this morning I dreamed that Willow (of BTVS) thought she might be pregnant and had asked me to help her find out for sure. In my dream, I was a good friend of hers. So how do you tell if someone's pregnant in Badsnake dreamland? Apparently you dance around on their stomach on tiptoe. But I didn't actually get that far. Willow decided that running around a track at 70mph would do it, so she did, and she was, in fact pregnant.

I expressed my sorrow that she wouldn't be a member of the all-girls club any more. In response, she kissed me. A fucking wonderful, full-tongue, long, passionate kiss. Whew. I was light-headed. And I didn't know if that was a sort of farewell, or if she just meant that being pregnant did not, in any shape or form, take her out of the lesbian running.

I don't know where Tara was in all this. The father of the baby was a Matthew McConaughey (in the "Ed TV" role) sort.

And speaking of Willow and Tara, my comic store had sold out of the special "Willow & Tara" issue with artwork by Terry Moore. Dammit. They're ordering one for me, but I can't exactly trust them. I asked them to order me a black female G.I. Joe helicopter pilot action figure once and they fell through. By the time I found out they had never ordered it, the value of the figure tripled and went beyond my means. Stupid comic guys. I did look through some regular BTVS comics, and the art was pretty lame in comparison to "Strangers In Paradise," so I can't wait to see this issue.

Okay, enough geekiness.

I forgot to tell one of my barbershop stories. The guys were gossiping about some man who had to postpone his haircut for a couple days. Why? Because he had headboard rash on the top of his head.

Yes, he had been fucked so hard for so long by some top who apparently wanted to exercise his kung fu hip action, that the poor sap had abrasions on his scalp from the ordeal. The barber swore that the guy, when he did show up, actually had scabby places on the top of his head.

I told Deb that sounded like something that I might be responsible for. I was just kidding. But then at family dinner she related that to the girls, saying I had a distinct note of pride in my voice. Like I'd be bragging about it if I banged a girl up against a wall so much I'd caused contusions and abrasions.

Deb and I had some rockin' sex yesterday morning and then went to Sweetwater Creek Park and had a lot of fun tromping around in the woods. I loooove tromping. I'll try to upload some pics tomorrow (of the creek, not the sex). But until then, I got some actual work to do.

Got a date tonight with Sara. I've almost finished the Spike and Dru book "Pretty Maids All in a Row," so I'm in a vampy mood. Hope she's not tired of Julian yet.