I need to get to work soon, so I'll just tell you about our fun team event for today. Remember the Valentine's one? Well today was the Easter fun team thing.

Here's the announcement we got about it.

Greetings, fellow [Company Name] people. I'm here to announce the Fun Team's Big Spring Breakfast and Easter Egg Hunt Extravaganza. This Thursday, at 8:30 a.m. sharp, the Fun Team will be throwing a couple hours of unadulterated good times your way. The critical element, as you know, in any unadulterated good time is free food, and yes, we will have plenty of that.

That's right, breakfast will be served in the conference room, and the free eats will be followed by the office-wide Easter Egg hunt. The eggs will be filled with fun prizes like candy, restaurant gift certificates, movie passes, and coupons for an extra week of vacation (okay, one of those is fake).

This year, the Fun Team Fun Regulators will be keeping a close eye on Blanche and all others whose dubiously strong performance in last year's contest shed a suspicious air on the entire proceeding. I have also heard reports that Emeka plans to all-out cheat this year, so she will be banned altogether.

Other fun festivities will include Matzoh Ball Bowling and Toss the Raw Easter Egg at Your Senior Manager. (Don't worry, Kris, I would never participate in such an activity. However, just an FYI, I've seen Danielle out back of her house throwing golf balls at a blonde scarecrow.) In any case, allot a couple hours for fun on Thursday morning. Remember, we are now allowed only two hours of fun per quarter, so take advantage while you can.

So be on time for the good grub, 'cause nobody likes cold grits and luke-warm coffee, unless they're very, very drunk. See you there.

-Jeff, Fun Miestro

I work for the goofiest people. I am also the biggest Easter Egg Hunt Loser. I found ZERO EGGS. Probably because I made fun of the Jeez-us Lady in yesterday's entry. One of my coworkers gave me one of his because he felt sorry for me. How pathetic is that? The candy inside tasted bitter and loser-y.

There was also a melee in my office over an egg that was hidden in my stainless steel travel mug that I drink coffee out of every morning. Apparently about three people were trying to shove their hands into my mug at one time. This was witnessed by the ten other people who had mobbed into my little room after getting a hint from one of the executive "hiders" that there was one in here. I washed the mug before I poured my coffee this morning.

The breakfast was good. No grits, though.

Dear Sara,

Pester? PESTER?! I PESTER you FOR SEX??

I write an ode to how incredible you are, and you write that I won't be PESTERING you again for awhile?!!!

Ooooooooooh.

If I had any willpower whatsoever you would SO be looking at a cold futon next Monday.

BAD BOTTOM! NO PUNISHMENT!

Hope you like vanilla.

Love,

Badsnake